Each night after the children are all tucked into their beds, I pause for a moment to look at them. One is happily positioned on the top bed, the other on the bottom. They are so peaceful, cozied up for their night’s rest. I wonder then, with all of this quiet beauty how can I feel so alone?
I wander downstairs through the empty house taking note of the messes I’m too tired to clean as I go. I see one cat, then two. I round another corner, and there is the dog. Their eyes, yearning for attention, turn to me hoping that I’ll stop to pet them. I do, for their sake. Still they do not ease my sense of lonely.
After sitting for a moment to collect my thoughts and reconcile all that happened during the day, I return upstairs to pull myself into my bed. It’s cold and untouched. The way lonely would feel. I reach for my book on my nightstand. My lone companion to see me through the night.
To bring back a term from the nineties – AS IF!
Oh, the glory of having a bed all to yourself. It’s amazing. Incredible. Miraculous, even. Here’s the real story.
Each night, after dinner has been eaten (or thrown on the ground), baths have been taken, and silliness has come to an end, the girls make their way to the top bunk, giggling along the way. Maddie helps to tuck in Riley, and after the girls have given each other a kiss and hug, Maddie returns to the bottom bunk, where she smiles awaiting my tuck in. Then, off to sleep. Yes, there is still talking. Yes, we are still working on them falling asleep without me in the room. But, most importantly, when those little eyes are shut, they remain shut (for the most part) in their own little beds. Riley on top and Maddie on the bottom. Mommy in her own bed.
I rarely wander downstairs, nervous that the mess will suck me in and I’ll end up staying up way too late. I stop to give the animals affection. They’ve lacked it for too long. It’s great being able to have some one-on-one time with them, and I know the cats appreciate the lack of tail pulling that typically accompanies Maddie’s affection. She’s learning.
I’m still too tired from the day to really collect my thoughts, but sitting down and having the option to do so is magical. One night, I even read for five minutes. Whoa.
Yes, the great transition to the bunk beds is going wonderfully. There are nights when a small body makes its way back to my bed, but for the most part, it has returned to a fabulously solitary bed of one, plus cats. The girls are in love with their new bed, and all is right with the world.Kids sleeping in their own beds is a beautiful thing. #momlife Click To Tweet